YOU are the CHANGE
I hope you never have to experience this or never have.
Three years ago one of my friends died in a brutal, violent, senseless way.
Her death in a murder / suicide killing spree in central Alberta shook my world.
I am no stranger to domestic abuse. I lived with it for most of my life.
Does that make it any harder (or easier) to process, to deal with, to understand violence & abuse? No. Not really. Why?
Because for most of the years I was living it, I was in denial.. comparing my situation to ones like my murdered friend.
Reach out & connect with someone to your left. Now reach to your right. One of the 3 people in the group you’ve just created is likely to develop cancer in their lifetime. Shocking right? So many people around you will be affected by this terrifying disease. What is even more shocking? They are just as likely to be victims of domestic violence.
Which of these stats makes you most uncomfortable?
1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of domestic violence. If it’s not you, then you know someone who has.
Being aware of the prevalence and high frequency is a start.
Understanding the definition is a prerequisite.
Sharing is a necessity.
Why?
Why should you care? Why can’t you continue to hope it goes away or that someone else will intervene?
Why?
Imagine yourself in a situation where you don’t feel 100% safe.
That, my friend, is abuse.
I lived with it for most of my life - feeling alone, ashamed, & afraid.
Imagine your daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece, nephew, brother, mother, friend – anyone – not feeling safe.
How many reach out and are met with zero belief, compassion, acceptance, or support? They face questions they can’t answer themselves. Questions that have kept them locked in (or returning to) abusive situations:
“Why don’t you just leave?”
“How did you let it get so bad?”
“Why have you put up with it so long?”
“Is it really that bad?”
“Are you sure it’s ‘abuse’?”
Please don’t turn away.
1 in 3 people you know are living in this hell.
They are staying in unsafe, abusive environments because they are scared, uncertain, demoralized, feeling alone & invisible.
They need to be seen.
YOU have the power to change this.
How?
1. Understand that ‘violence’ includes far more than physical abuse – it is also psychological, financial, emotional, sexual, and psychosocial.
2. Speak up. Become the safe supportive village that won’t tolerate disrespect or look the other way.
YOU are part of the change that will give them hope in hell.
Get your FREE copy of my eBook “YOU are the CHANGE” where you’ll find tools for defining & identifying abuse, sharing your story, supporting others, finding help, and self-care healing.
You matter. You are important. You are needed.
You, my friend, are part of the change.
I know I can count on you.
xo Deena
Are you looking for a community of other women like you who have been through, are going through, or would like to support someone dealing with an abusive situation?
I’ve created an online support group as a place where you can make connections and find others who have been there or are still experiencing domestic abuse and violence. Others who are also looking for encouragement and support. You can share where you are in your journey and where you'd like to go. We all work together to support each other from a very understanding and safe place.
You can join these online meetings from the comfort, safety, and privacy of wherever you want to join. There is no cost to attend, and it's done over zoom. You're more than welcome to check it out and join us to see what it's all about. Hopefully you will find connections with others who can help you through this. Here is the link for the “Hope in Hell” Online Women’s Support Group on Meetup.
We look forward to getting to know you and together find “Hope in Hell”.
Interested in sharing your story?
Find out more at this link.
Do you need help right now?
Here are some links:
The Today Centre (Edmonton)
Women on Wings (Calgary)
Women's Shelters (Alberta)
Women's Shelters (Canada)
List of Global Resources
You are NOT ALONE! There are people who care & want to help.
I also have a new PODCAST with a “Hope in Hell” series where you can meet the wonderful people making a difference, meet brave people who have been there, and learn more about how we can all be part of the change.
