Bitch or Bestie?
Who lives inside YOUR head?
If it’s a nasty bitch, yattering mean shit about you and anything in your world – there are ways you can change that AND become besties.
Here are 3 STEPS to TAKE YOUR INNER BULLY from BITCH to BESTIE.
Whether she’s on duty part-time or all-the-time, she makes your life miserable with her toxic crap.
She thinks she’s the expert on you and every damn choice you make; the expert on every single detail in your life.
Those new pair of jeans that you thought made your ass look sawweeeet? Ya, I bet she had an opinion on those.
Having a good hair day? She’s sure to point out the dark circles under your eyes.
Aced a project? Oh, she’ll find a flaw and make sure that’s all you can see about it now.
Sound familiar? I was pretty sure you had your own resident bully inside your head too.
Well, as much as you’d like to shut her up, kick her arse to the curb and live happily ever after.. maybe there’s a better way – something that both of you can live with (and it’s longer lasting). Cuz you know she ain’t gonna take an eviction lying down.
She’s a persistent pain in the rectum and knows aaaaalllll your weaknesses.
So, let’s see what we can do to make friends with her. Seeing as how well she knows you, and she insists on being your roommate, she could actually turn out to be the best bestie you ever had!
Here’s something to try the next time she has a negative comment for you:
1. Thank her.
Ya, you heard me right.
Thank her.
I bet that’ll stop her in mid-rant.
2. Ask her to explain why she said what she said.
There may be something to learn from her observations. If nothing else, you can ask yourself if there’s any truth to it or if it’s just plain mean. Is what she said something you’d say to your best friend? Challenge her to explain why she felt the need to say that. Is she scared you’ll feel too good about yourself, and she thinks it’s her mission to keep you playing small, scared & silent?
3. Tell her she’s welcome back inside your head if she’s willing to play nice.
Challenge her to find something positive to say about you. Make her say 3 things in 30 seconds that are awesome about you. No free pass. As soon as she’s apologized and you’re willing to let her move back in, she will be ready to try harder to be your bestie.
She’s so used to getting away with this cruel behavior, it’s time to make her accountable. She’ll think twice about saying anything nasty the next time. She knows you’re onto her bullshit now. And she’s going to get tired of being called a liar, while she pouts from her spot on the curb where you keep ditching her.
It’s ok to protect yourself from the bullies outside AND IN.
Once you start standing up for yourself, you’ll experience how empowering it feels to be your own ally – even against your inner bully.
You’ll notice & challenge all the lies you’ve been hearing and accepting as truth – ones that made you cringe and want to hide.
You’ll start to see more opportunities to stretch out of your comfort zone, build your confidence, flex your muscles and roar I AM FUCKIN’ AMAZING!!
Now, go pull those jeans out from under your bed, slide those bad boys back on, and take your sweet ass out to conquer your world! You really are FUCKIN’ INCREDIBLE! and your new bestie knows it. Keep her honest.
xo Deena
